Reaching out

What does one do when a friend's in a bit of a spot? When you want to reach out to help, when it pains you to watch them grieve, and you wish, somehow, you knew the thing to make it better.

I usually find myself trapped within my own ineptitude. Wanting to say just the right word, do just the right thing, but paralysed by my own hesitancy. Of what? The fear of doing the one thing that might make it worse. The fear of being presumptious in assuming they may want my involvement, or that I may be able to help. And I reach out a tentative hand, but before they've even seen it, I withdraw it quickly again.

Each time, I find myself wavering at the bring of should-I-or-shouldn't-I. And suddenly, even as the thoughts are still swirling in my mind, the moment's passed, and I can't offer anymore. And they've done it on their own, they're okay again. But it just might have been so much easier if I'd only offered to help.

And I think to myself retrospectively - How ridiculous, I should have just offered. What could I have possibly lost. Next time I'll do it right. Next time.

What do you do?